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Some thoughts on birthdays

My birthday was exactly a week ago. I meant to have this post done sooner but I had writer's block and was not in the mood. So yeah, story of my life.

On the day of your birth people usually send you well wishes with the word happy being a central part. On Instagram (I know, I know) you just see people's friends make the day special and everybody just looks so god damn happy.

What if the day of your birth just throws you in a state of sadness cause you realise how little people you actually have in your life. That was me one week ago. Leading up to my birthday I'm always positive and think it's going to be great but I'm always disappointed. Lesson learned, don't have high expectations.

Ok, so the day itself wasn't awful it was just average. Nothing special. It also sucked cause my Mum was in hospital so we couldn't spend the whole day together. It may be childish and superficial but I was also disheartened by the fact I received no gifts, other than the ones I got myself of course. One is currently on its way to me and I can't wait.

Going into next year I should either delete Facebook or just get rid of all my friends cause that's the centre of it. I also need to not caring about external validation. Let's see how well that goes.

I was feeling down most of last week and these feelings have trickled through to this week. I've always been anxious and get sad easily. These feelings will pass, they always do.


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